Thursday, May 28, 2009

Letters I've been meaning to write.

Dear Burger King,

I don't have any children. But, typically, I think most parents would want to avoid a kids' meal advertisement that consists entirely of a bunch of provocative women dancing (women dancing provocatively?) during a voice over. Even if the punchline is that the women have "Sponge-Bob" bumbs.

Sincerely,

E

Dear Brother Dave,

You may have noted that you and I have played 36 games of Quordy over the last month. I'm certain you've also noticed the score. You: 35 Me: 1.

I have a confession: I cheated.

I couldn't find a 5-letter word on the board; I couldn't bear the humiliation of another zero point score on a one-minute game. It's so stressful! So I wrote the board down as quickly as I could and paused the game. Then I used an internet cheat. There were only two words in the board. I put them both in. That's how I won. I'm sorry.

Forgive me? I promise not to do it again! Give me many more chances, please? With a cherry on top?? If I ever manage to beat you (unlikely -- since my vocabulary and visual word recognition are far inferior), I promise it will be because I worked really hard.

Love,

E

Dear kitchen sink,

If I ask really nicely, will you stop leaking? I'm not sure what else to do, since I can't even tell where you're leaking from.

Best,

E

3 comments:

David said...

That's ok -- I'm pretty sure Dave S cheated twice to win, too! (Some of the words he came up with can't possibly be in his vocabulary and weren't the type you can guess by trying common vowel or consonant combinations.)

lisa at twolooseteeth.com said...

Confusing. I thought you were talking about MY Brother Dave.

e said...

Well, I've no doubt the same scenario would hold true. But YOUR Brother Dave has already given up on me. Rightfully so. I have often thought about a "Boggle: Meeting of the Daves" tournament, though. Because THAT would be interesting and maybe one of them would actually feel challenged. Unlikely though. Somehow, they'd both still win every game.